Take a deep breath. Feel the heart beating fast. The rage is running through your veins, I know you can feel it because it burns inside as if it were a huge flame. But, what's the point in letting it burn the walls of your veins, rage is not going anywhere unless you decide to face the truth for once and for all and you notice that you're not the only one with a fear of being left behind, you're not the only one who feels alone....yes, that rage that you feel is not because you're in a huff with the world, but because you're mad at yourself. You're mad that things don't go your way...But, when do things go our way? They never do unless you're a lucky bastard.

I guess that when I start feeling happy with myself and with who I am, I'll start enjoying myself everywhere that I go. I was once told I'm like a marionette with whom everybody can do whatever they want no matter what it is, because I'm so undecided about my own life that anyone who comes around will influence me and will shape me to whatever shape they want of me..whether it is because of their convenience or because things happen like that. Lately, things haven't turned out the way I wanted but that's ok. Now I feel I know something else about myself, I've come to know me a little bit better and even if I won't make any change any time soon, I know that I have to change some things of my personality, and not because I'm trying to please someone else, but because I've noticed it's better for me in order not to get hurt so many times so often.

Maybe I've given too much from me without receiving anything back. Maybe I'm tired of being a friend and now I need to be a foe. Who knows? Not even I do. I am certain I won't stop being a friendly person...even though that is often misunderstood as nosey. I love life, I know it might look dark sometimes and now it's almost black to me, I can hardly see further. But I know I will find a light and I'll be able to see a new day where I am a different person happy with himself. I still have tons of things to do but it's getting late and I'm getting lazy to keep writing.